One boob, one drain, one ball and no hair. Rawr, hawt, right? Anniversary Dinner in a fancy place. Challenge accepted and defeated! Staying consistently inconsistent with this zany journey, a few days before our 15th wedding anniversary, I had to go in for emergency surgery to remove my beautiful right expander and start over. ahhh, one boob wonder! Let’s see…diagnosed on Shawn’s birthday, surgery for Cayden’s, port surgery and chemo for mine and then Thanksgiving night in the hospital. This is not a tradition I like at all!! That meant medications that limited what I could eat and some craziness in terms of “what do I wear and which wig, if any, goes on my head?” I wound up trying over a dozen dresses in my closet until I found one that concealed the fact I was lopsided and had a drain and bulb still attached to me. I won that one!! I’ve noticed that wigs feel good for about an hour or so then it gets itchy and tight and all kinds of unpleasant. Sitting at The Manor, I was dying to just take it off but I waited til we got home. I need to figure out how to adjust that thing!!
Speaking of wigs, I have three…one through my health insurance (that’s what I wore Saturday night for dinner), one from the American Cancer Society and another through the Pink Wig Project. They are a foundation that provides wigs for women going through chemotherapy and have lost their hair. I got mine in the mail a few days ago and fell in love with how silky this bubble gum pink thing is. Not only that, its ridiculously comfortable and looks perfect on!
I decided to wear the pink wig to my third round of chemotherapy this week. I certainly got quite a few stairs dropping my kids off at middle school. Once I got to the cancer center, everyone I encountered smiled and loved the pink. The cancer center is a sad place, very pretty, but we are all there because we’re battling something fierce. It’s quiet, aside from the television in the reception area. People tend to look at the floor. I’m hopeful that my bubble gum pink head bought some cheer to the waiting area. Yes, cancer is dark and scary and there are so many twists and turns in the journey but there’s room for light and laughter, too. I tend to see the funnier sides of it. A bold pink wig, go big or go home. I felt brave and lighthearted wearing it, and it made me smile.
I was nervous that I would not be approved as I am on two pretty strong antibiotics and one week post-operative. Turns out, the medications I am on do not interfere and may offer me some protection for a bit on this round. My blood counts came back fine aside from being a little anemic, which I’m told is quite normal with this process. My infection tested with a positive response to one of the medications I am on so it should be wiped out. The area is still red and bruised but I’m hopeful that’s just from the surgery last week.
I was good to start Round Three. My nurses got such a kick out of my hair and wound up hanging out with me for most of my time in the infusion suite. When I noticed I did not pack snacks into my “chemo bag of tricks’ they managed to get a hold of someone with a HUGE box of goodies! I was all set after that and behaved. Just one piece of chocolate, pita chips and a protein bar. When my actual first chemo drug infusion started, they bought in ice pops for me. I did not choke nor get brain freeze this time! Winning! My room was like a little party. With my second chemo drug, I developed some really bizarre pain in my sinuses and began sneezing like crazy, which I’m told is normal. I’ve must have blown out over two cups from my nose, you’re welcome for that… Chug that water. I was fine and done by noon…chugging a liter of water on the drive home.
One of the funnier things that chemo does is it changes your tastes and sometimes you get overwhelming cravings. Last time it was the week of nachos. I kid you not. The thought of food made me gag but damn, I wanted nachos in the worst way. We had a lot of nachos that week, all over the place. Needless to say, my husband and kids were thrilled! This time, immediately following chemo, I can’t even figure this one out, I wanted broccoli and a burnt burger with no bread. I don’t even like red meat right now. I could either make that and dirty my spotless kitchen or find a place locally. I took myself out and it was fantastic and exactly what I wanted. I wondered if this is what the next week will be like. Will I be craving broccoli and burnt burgers for my meals? I woke up this morning jonesing for some broccoli…so it begins…
So far, this Round Three seems to be a kinder version of Rounds One and Two. I did not get the racing and pounding heart rate like the previous two times. The horrific heartburn and hiccups from Round Two are not present either. I do have a touch of chemo brain and it added some fun to this morning when I could not find a nicely made and heated up cheese steak sandwich for my kids lunches. Seriously, how did I lose that? And no, I haven't found that yet. Waving a baguette in the air while yelling out, “I cannot make you a sandwich without bread!! What am I gonna do?” had both kids dying of laughter. Oh, I found the slippers I was searching hours for as well. They were on my feet. Apparently I drove in them to school. Chemo, the gift that keeps on giving. I slept relatively well, like a baby in fact. I drank a liter of water overnight and was up quite a bit!! I have a hair less (haha, I have no hair) than two weeks to go until my last dance with The Red Devil and then the easier stuff starts after that for 12 weeks.
Winter break starts soon. I need this break. Trying to make sure the kids are on top of school work and well prepared and running the house is tough with chemo brain. Add all of the holiday stuff on top along with unexpected surgery and lots of crazy medication, but I get it done. Actually, it’s all done and wrapped and cleaned up. Even the last minute scramble the day before chemo was all done, wrapped and organized for my husband. It’s what I do. Sometimes I think being a mother has given me strengths I never knew possible. I have a child who has fought through a disability and does amazing things now. He’s shown me what it means to be tough, now it’s my turn to show him what he’s taught me…
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