When I was diagnosed with cancer, it was as if someone had hit the Stop and then the Fast Forward button of life for me.
Time stopped. Life as I knew it stopped. I had become a cancer patient. With that, my life was on pause. Thus began the never ending waits for appointments, results and surgeries. As the world continued on for everyone else, I was in cancer land, living Wednesday to Wednesday, never planning more than a week ahead.
Oddly enough, with all the stopping and waiting, time did not drag on. The cancer life is a whirlwind. Just as abruptly as being tossed into the chaotic waves of cancer, I was yanked out, in remission and flung back into the world of muggles, no map nor guide. Here’s the thing, once you’ve gone through the shit storm of cancer, surgeries and treatments that lasted 16 months, you can’t just pick yourself up and waltz right back into the life you left behind. That’s gone.
My tired and battered self was airdropped back in, where everyone else’s life had gone on as normal while mine is anything but. I was left with a sense of lost time for my sentence of chemotherapy. I was stepping into a world that was two years ahead of here I was. There’s no catching up, it just can’t be done.
Instead of trying to get my old life back, I’ve created a better one for myself. Yes, different can mean better. Life after cancer can be what we want, so long as we are realistic. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not simple and it is indeed a juggling act as I am not an island and do have responsibilities but I do make sure to take care of myself.
This is my fourth (of many yet to come) Cancer Survivor Day. Celebrate the survivors, look to us for guidance or inspiration no matter where you are in your journeys, even if a muggle! Listen to our stories and struggles, ask us questions (don’t be shy) and learn that there is always hope and research occurring. Recognize that early detection can save lives, it saved mine. I am a survivor. #NationalCancerSurvivorsDay #HER2CancerSurvivor #LifeAfterCancer
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