Breasts, boobs, tatas, funbags, call them what you will… but pay attention. Talk. Talk about getting screenings and self exams just as you would if it were a cold or broken toe. It is not taboo. Ask yourself if you’re on schedule with your check ups, ask your sisters, mothers, wives and friends. This is a conversation we need to be having more of. Talk about the process. Mammogram. For some reason, the word sounds funny to me. I always think of the Landshark skit from Saturday Night Live. You’re welcome. How can something uncomfortable sounds that silly? Maybe the silliness eases the stress of going for me. It’s a few minutes of discomfort. Not a big deal. There are three dimensional ones now too. Insurance will cover the screenings. If there is no insurance, there are so many organizations that will arrange for a screening at no or very minimal charge to the patient. In other words, no excuses. If you need help accessing funds or want help finding a place, reach out to me. I’ll pep talk you into going. Buy me coffee and I may go with you for the ride!
Breast cancer isn’t just one thing. It’s a crazy combination of different things, none of which you will know until an initial pathology report comes in from a biopsy. Oh, there are several kinds of biopsies as well. Breast cancer treatments and surgical options are custom tailored to the very specific one a woman has. There are different kinds of breast cancer with a plethora of combinations of positive and negative receptors. It is specific for every woman but it is treatable and curable when caught early enough. Let me repeat myself. Early detection will save your life. Let us not worry about saving the tatas, let’s focus on saving women’s lives and then helping them to become whole again…
I get screened every six months. I was supposed to go in late April. One son had pneumonia and then I had it. I postponed going. I know, bad. Then it was summer and we were out of the country. When we came home, we had three weeks til our next vacation. I should have gone then. I didn’t. While we were downtheshore (it’s one word in Joisey), my head got to me. I made the appointments for my diagnostics (mammogram and ultrasound) as well as by bone density scans. Did I fail to mention that I HAD the beginnings of osteoporosis? HAD. I reversed my numbers!! I go every two years for that. Obviously, my tests detected Felicia nestled cozily in my left boob but we evicted her…and again my head got to me.
I was late with my screenings. Not only was there a cancerous lesion in my breast but we found out after surgery, Felicia sent her friends to set up shop in my first sentinel lymph node. Seriously, just how long was she there and how fast was she taking over?!?!? And the ‘what if’s start.’ That’s never a good thing. Especially when you have cancer. I spoke with my plastic surgeon about this. Had I gone when I was supposed to, maybe it would never have spread to my node and my staging would be different. Things would be easier. Right? No. He countered with, had I gone in April or May, maybe the lesion would have gone undetected. Perhaps it would have grown even more til I went again in October or November. Maybe I would not have been as lucky as I am now. The only one who knows that is whoever is above. To get through a diagnosis like this, you have to let go a little and have faith and trust. Maybe I somehow got lucky but it sure as hell is a wakeup call for me to stay on top of my health! I said lucky. This could have played out so much worse. Ladies, please stay on top of your health. Make your health and medical appointments a priority. Do not schedule around convenience. Trust me, what I am going through is not convenient. It certainly has its moments of pure hilarity but it’s a royal pain in the ass and the rest of my body. Cancer doesn’t give a shit about schedules and plans, we need to give a shit about keeping ourselves healthy. Understood?
I am finally drain free and righty is playing catch up to lefty with expansions. I've lost my two pairs of balls (I'm so tough I don't even need balls anymore) but have now acquired two boobs, one magnificent one and a booblette. I have to admit that I am really liking the way I am starting to look. Don't get me wrong, a double mastectomy with sentinel and axcillary lymph node removal is a brutal operation that not only changes you physically but emotionally as well and leaves you will all kinds of fatigue. Your range of motion is shot, hello T Rex arms. Sleeping is just downright uncomfortable and just moving around the house tires you out extremely fast.
The first few weeks were awful when I looked in the mirror. It has eased up and I can now somewhat figure out how I am going to look in a few moths. However, there's the prospect of chemotherapy looming right now. That could change many things, such as timing of the final operation and I may lose my hair. That would be another blow but deep down inside, I know that I will get my life back and my hair will grow back. I will be here for a full and long life. It may just be a little rough for a few more months. I am not scared of this. I was scared shitless of surgery. I am however worried about my strength and energy and being able to really help my sons. I am worried about winter illnesses seeping into my home. There will need to be adjustments again if this is the case. I find out on Thursday when I meet with my medical oncologist. Teamwork makes the dream work and I have a fantastic team of doctors who are all pushing for me to be cured, because I was caught in time...
The end of October is coming to an end. That means the end of seeing pink everywhere for breast cancer awareness for a while. Not a problem. I’m going to be here as a reminder to everyone that early detection is key to saving your life. It is saving mine.
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